Effective coaching helps produce ministry leader champions. Maybe that's why it's such hard work. In fact, it's a spiritual battle and our arch-enemy, Satan and his demonic forces,
work hard to defeat and destroy ministry leaders. Their methods include using the world and the flesh against those who would encourage and equip others who would become ministry champions for Christ. Here are 10 enemies who would defeat ministry coaches in their very important work.
- Project vs relationship – One of the enemies of coaching ministry leaders is to view coaching as a project instead of a helping relationship. How to defeat the enemy – cultivate and build a coaching relationship of encouragement and equipping just like Barnabas did with the Apostle Paul.
- Brain processing – On average, you are able to speak between 125-175 words per minute. Contrast that with being able to listen at an average rate of approximately 450 words per minute. The net result is that your mind easily tends to wander. How to defeat the enemy – focus on listening, take notes and reflect back what was said.
- Training – Pastors and Christian leaders are trained to talk and give answers. Very little if any time in training is given to learning how to increase your listening capacity. How to defeat the enemy – study, learn, and practice listening skills on a continuing basis.
- Agenda - The goal of coaching is to have the one being coached set the agenda, but it's a lot easier for the coach to set the agenda of coaching sessions. How to defeat the enemy – always have the person being coached set the agenda at the beginning of the coaching session and keep it in writing in front of you.
- Multi-tasking – Busyness is the enemy of coaching relationships. We have become self-trained at multi-tasking and all too often the weapons of the enemy are the smartphone and the computer. How to defeat the enemy – before you coach someone, remove your cell phone and clear your desk and any other obvious distractions so you can focus on coaching.
- Signal to noise ratio – The Urban Dictionary defines signal to noise ratio as "the ratio of useful information to useless information in any given statement." Your willingness and ability to discern the "noise" or useless information in a conversation is an important element in coaching. How to defeat the enemy – focus on the agenda and interrupt the coaching conversation with grace and love if need be to get the one you're coaching get back on track with his or her agenda.
- Turning off your heart – There is both an objective and a subjective element to coaching. Ask good coaching questions, listen intently, but listen to the heart when the one you're coaching answers and explanations. You cannot turn off the heart in a coaching relationship. Watch for facial and other non-verbal expressions if you can to see emotions come out and respond with your heart. How to defeat the enemy of ignoring the heart – respond when you hear or see the heart expressing feelings. Love the person you're coaching.
- Past experience – Past experience affects the way you respond to the person you are attempting to coach, for good or for bad. It could be your own negative experience with others or the past negative experiences of the one you are coaching. It might be something negative from your last coaching meeting or from a pattern of negative from the person's past. How to defeat the enemy – make a note of a negative experience or thought and move on to another question. After the coaching where past experience has affected the conversation, review your notes, pray and ask God to help you avoid or deal constructively with your experience in coaching.
- Diagnosing too quickly – Jumping to a conclusion about an issue that your friend is facing may well interrupt the work of the Holy Spirit in coaching. It may also hinder him or her from working out their own best way of resolving issues or setting goals. A coach is not there to diagnose problems and issues. That's the job of the person being coached. How to defeat the enemy – never assume that you know the answer to anyone's problems or issues, or that you know the best diagnosis or plan. Pray for the Holy Spirit to lead the one being coached, and refuse to take on the role of a mentor or a counselor in a coaching session.
- Ignoring what you see or hear – Like diagnosing too quickly, ignoring what you hear or see has the possibility of hindering the work of the Holy Spirit. In coaching, even subtle hints should not be ignored or minimized. Use them to help form coaching questions. How to defeat the enemy – when you see, hear, or sense something about the one being coached, note it on paper and open your eyes and ears more to see or hear something similar. Think of a question that might help explore what you noticed if it appears to be relevant to your coaching conversation.
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